Pain and consolation

 Continuing on with this crazy year of break-down for my greater family.......my cousin - in her early 50's died of a heart attack when she went out to do some errands. Her daughter found her, then her sister who lived across the street tried to do CPR but to no avail. Julie Conover Mason's funeral was on Friday. She had eight children. Her oldest son died when he was four. One of her five daughters is married, but the other four are not. She had three children still at home, one in middle school, and two in high school. Her second son was married the Friday before she died and her funeral on April 21st was a week after his wedding. She will not be there in person for her other daughter's weddings.

But that is not quite enough for this week and year. My uncle Ken died on Thursday and his funeral will be next Saturday on the 29th of April. I called my Aunt Mary and she had been trying to make it up to Idaho for Julie's funeral and could not get there. She said she was glad because she knew she needed to go Provo instead to help April and Spencer with the funeral arrangements and closing up Ken's home. 

I am so glad I talked to her because she told me of the long suffering Ken had been going through physically. He had been on hospice several times as they thought he would die eight years ago. Aunt Mary said we should celebrate his life as now he is "dancing in heaven" with his former wife, Inez. He was preceded by two of his children and his wife and will have rejoicing now. 

I had a really hard time with Julie's death and listening to the funeral service (online) was a tremendous comfort and strength to me. I don't know if it was her daughter or sister, but a young woman gave a talk amongst the tears and memories of Julie, that was eye opening and of solace.

She quoted Elder Bednar in "Bear Up Their Burdens with Ease" and quoted this paragraph:

"There is no physical pain, no spiritual wound, no anguish of soul or heartache, no infirmity or weakness you or I ever confront in mortality that the Savior did not experience first. In a moment of weakness we may cry out, “No one knows what it is like. No one understands.” But the Son of God perfectly knows and understands, for He has felt and borne our individual burdens. And because of His infinite and eternal sacrifice (see Alma 34:14), He has perfect empathy and can extend to us His arm of mercy. He can reach out, touch, succor, heal, and strengthen us to be more than we could ever be and help us to do that which we could never do relying only upon our own power. Indeed, His yoke is easy and His burden is light."

She went on to say, "one of my favorite names that Jesus Christ has is beloved Son. And when I think about Julie I think about beloved. The definition is: dearly loved. The Latin definition is sweet, agreeable, dear, delightful, pleasant. Jesus Christ really did minister one by one and I think we heard today how Julie really ministered unto us one by one. (There had been about ten or twelve people who gave stories and examples of Julie's service and love to everyone previously.)

This young woman also quoted Elder Holland in "Lifted up upon the Cross": "It is one of the most powerful paradoxes of the Crucifixion that the arms of the Savior were stretched wide open and then nailed there, unwittingly but accurately portraying that every man, woman, and child in the entire human family is not only welcome but invited into His redeeming, exalting embrace.^" 

^{She also talked about the children picking a symbol for their mother. Four of them picked a butterfly.} 

^{Julie had a butterfly on the place she called her Brandon Tree, where she left little things in remembrance.}  

^{She had put a butterfly that lit up at night and this} young woman had seen it early in the morning and "studied more about butterflies. "And it says when a butterfly emerges from the chrysalis, there is a struggle and process that they must accomplish on their own that strengthens their wings and gives them the ability to fly. The timing of their emerging from the chrysalis is key for their flight. As we have visited with family and friends here, we have seen that Julie left a map of all the tiny perfect things to show us of her love before she took flight."  "Julie has gained her Angel wings to soar to new destinations." 

On Sunday I had a lesson on the Importance of Jesus Christ's resurrection. Kelsi was kind enough to play "Gethsemane" on her guitar for my girls while they all sang. That was deeply moving and touching to me also. There seems to be a lot a crying and solace this year.......