Balance

 Now I'm done. All the stockings have been given out, the missionary box has been dropped off at the mission home, the last of the little sacks of goodies have been given out. I just have cards to send. I'll probably send ecards to my friends. It has been a fun Christmas season and I have enjoyed my projects.

Fun things that went in the missionary box

I have been making plans for January and cutting down on spending and making strict budgets for the new year. In our zeal to to good and be generous we/mostly I have over stepped over the mark. Too much, with too high of expectations is not good for anyone and not good for us either. I am listening more and not jumping to fix things. 

So my plan is to still be generous but not overly. I have cut out a few things that were getting to be too much. I won't be making banana bread every Saturday for a Monday distribution with drinks. I am going to only spend so much on suppers for Sunday and have a strict budget for ward happenings. I am listening more when I am told very sad stories and asking the person what they are going to do. I am finding my balance. 

Jeffrey was helping me out and started adding up my budgets. We worked out a doable plan. But first thing that happened was an invitation to a wedding. Something over the budget plan.

I asked him how much we should give. He asked if we knew them and why we needed to give anything. Ahhh, because it is expected? Is it expected? What do I know of a Ghanian wedding? Besides the fact that there are three ceremonies for an LDS bride and groom to go through. Everyone talks about the Bride Price and the hoops the grooms family has to go through to get the girl. 

Now I am getting mixed messages from the people I am talking to. And no, I have never met the bride or groom. I know her very kind and generous father who works near us. Ah balance, to go or not to go.....

Expectations:

As an example of too much too high: The first time we went shopping at MaxMart in the store we went to every Saturday for our first mission in Accra, Jeffrey gave the security guards 100 cedis. Way over the mark. He knows how much inflation as risen and knows that salaries do not match. Well.........every time I go back on my own I can see the expectation is 100 and there are three guards. The girls at the front. Then I pay for a driver. So to go to that store, I need at least 700 cedis to start out with (about $47). Nope, it is too much. So I don't shop there anymore. 

Now the stores I go to, I let the driver do the tipping. Much better, more affordable. In fact, more of my shopping is being done by native people. I can pay Comfort to go to the market and still get a better deal than I would in the grocery store. Win-win. She gets a little and I pay less. 

Eugene and Dumevi get Cook's margarine, rice, and flour in a bigger bag at almost a third less than the grocery store. Winning again. 

Hopefully I will be in a better place and feel good about my decisions.