Crying

 Ahh no, no, it's my little sister......

"Dear Family,

______ got the news back today from her doctor. She has stage 4 melanoma. It appears to have spread through her lymph system now appearing in her lungs and 9 tumors throughout her body.  She is going in for a MRI to scan her brain.  The doctor says she has about 6 1/2 years with treatment. We are going to have a family fast soon Sunday for _____ and her family.  Please join us if you can."

All yesterday night I scittered around in my head, crying one minute and going blank the next. I think I held it together just fine in Young Women's - but it was easy to do nothing as others were in charge. 

My memories of walking her as a little baby when she was getting her teeth in. Mom and dad were taking care of the infant twins while the toddler was upset in pain with her teeth coming in. She was always mine to take care of when duties were assigned out because I was the oldest.  After I left for college and came back one day, she took me into account and asked why I was being so bossy. I am glad she said something as what I thought was efficiency was rude and intrusive. It has kept me thinking much deeper when I come into any situation. I feel it out before opening my mouth and sticking a foot in.

We had one great visit several years ago when I stayed at her house for a night. But I don't have a lot of meetings with her on a year to year basis. A few phone calls, a visit when I'm in Utah and she comes over to Susie's house. Watching comments and pictures on Facebook.  And then I'm crying again because she still has a girl in school that she won't be able to see go to college or be there physically for her when she gets married. Will she see her daughter graduate from high school?

I do have a firm knowledge that there is a fulfilling life after death, but like a child I'm crying for the toy now....or that will soon be taken away. 

What is the best thing to do now? What would giver her the best help and strength? 

What do I pray for? I know God can heal her completely and I know He could give her strength to endure this challenge and difficulty.  What is God's will in this? What is my responsibility? Crying again.